From the moment Cove was born there was something off about his latch. It was very painful (more than the usual), his upper lip was curled under, it was a very shallow latch and he kept coming off of the breast and we would have to latch again. He would latch a little better when I wore a nipple shield, but while nursing it was as if he was chewing instead of sucking. It was very painful! Even when I would think it was a decent latch, he still didn't drain me and I would end up needing to pump and give him a bottle. I tried for about a week, but then realized it just wasn't working (I was getting clogged ducts) and his latch wasn't improving so I started to fully pump.
our sweet boy
When Cove was 3 weeks old we took him to the doctor to get checked for a tongue tie. I had started looking into more information about tongue ties because I came across an article that listed symptoms of a tongue tie and it REALLY sounded like what he had! So I brought him in to get looked at and our doctor said no, he isn't tongue tied. Unfortunately, where I live there aren't many resources for support when it came to breastfeeding. Our local lactation consultant moved away so I would need to travel to make appointments with one in British Columbia.
I kept digging for more information and then came across an article about a lip tie. Again, all of the symptoms listed for a lip tie sounded exactly like what we had been experiencing with Cove! I lifted his lip up and sure enough I could see a lip tie! Now I wasn't 100% because I had never even known about lip ties before but I was pretty damn certain that's what we were dealing with.
Again, I made an appointment with our doctor to get his lip tie looked at but once again I wasn't satisfied with the answer. As my doctor explained it.. in her point of view as his doctor she doesn't see his lip tie as a concern because he is able to eat from a bottle and is gaining weight. BUT from a dentists point of view they might see it as a problem due to their training and concerns. It made sense the way she explained it to me, however I just felt like I couldn't get a straight answer!! It was so frustrating.
I ended up joining a tongue and lip tie Facebook support group and I was able to reach out and talk with other mom's dealing with the same issue.
I found these support groups very helpful! What I had learned in these groups were that tongue and lip ties are starting to become more well known and more babies are being born with them. It is kind of a controversial subject when it comes to speaking with a doctor about them because many doctors don't have any training on them and it is easy for them to dismiss them. There are lists of preferred providers who are trained on ties and are able to preform revisions on tongue and lip ties.
You can find your local providers here - https://www.tt-lt-support-network.com
Bottom line. YOU have to do your own research and be the advocate for you baby!! I'll be honest, I still find the whole thing confusing and overwhelming. I have been researching and looking into what to do about Cove's lip tie and went back and forth to whether we needed to see a preferred provider. Since I wasn't nursing I wasn't sure if we still needed to get his lip tie released. We made an appointment with a Dr. Chan in North Vancouver who was listed as a preferred provider. He is a dentist, has further training in ties and with breastfeeding. I had read a lot of good things about him in the support group so I felt good about seeing him and to get some answers.
Vancouver bound
On Monday we flew to Vancouver and I felt very nervous, but at the same time ready to get this appointment over with. Dr. Chan seemed very knowledgeable, took pictures of Cove's lip tie and possible tongue tie and then went into detail to find out information from us about his symptoms. NOW, this is where it started to get confusing to me. Dr. Chan seemed very PRO breastfeeding (which is great) however it seemed he kept going back to the fact that because I am not nursing and Cove is able to get milk from a bottle then he didn't fully see a need to release his lip tie. He explained his point of view, listened to our concerns and then stepped out of the room to let Sean and I discuss and come up with a decision. In that very moment I felt like a lost, confused, unsure, not confident mother. I was hearing what Dr. Chan was saying, BUT because of the fact that Cove wasn't able to nurse I DO see a huge issue. Even when he feeds from a bottle he has a poor latch, pops off, gets extra air, seems to get frustrated while eating, has a huge gap between his front teeth and I don't want to wait and see other issues come in the near future. I have read they can have speech issues and dental issues. So we decided to go through with the procedure. Now I don't want to scare anyone who may be needing to get the procedure done, but it is never fun to hear your baby cry or in pain. Sean said it was probably harder on me than it was on Cove. I had to keep telling myself he won't remember this and why we are doing it.
I have read that MOST lip ties also come with a posterior tongue tie. Again, we have been told he doesn't have a tongue tie, but since he has a lip tie I was still concerned. When Dr. Chan examined Cove's ties I felt as though I couldn't get a straight answer from him! It was kind of frustrating. He kept explaining how everyone is born with some degree of ties, but it depends on the function and symptoms of the ties whether to get the released or not. I get THAT.. but does he have a tongue tie too or not!? He didn't seem concerned about his tongue at all so we only had his lip tie released.
Sleeping on the plane
Poor baby boy was so tired, uncomfortable and in pain after the procedure
This whole topic gives me a headache to be honest.. One moment I feel like we have done our job with doing the research, seeing a preferred provider, taking his symptoms into consideration and going with what we felt was right, but then I start to worry again. Should I get second opinion for another preferred provider about his tongue?? At this moment in time we just have to focus on Cove healing and continue doing his stretches. (There are lip stretches that need to be done before we feeds to make sure the lip tie doesn't grow back. It isn't very easy or fun to do!)
I wanted to write this blog post just to let other mom's out there know they're not alone, to help give some direction in resources and to also just spread more awareness about ties. I wish so badly I would have known about Cove's lip tie when he was a newborn! I always wonder if I would have been able to nurse him if we would have had his lip tie revised sooner. Hopefully this will all be done and behind us soon and please feel free to reach out to me if you'd like any more information or have any questions!
xo Ashley
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